Engineering Students: What Answer Do You Need ?

Recently while stumbling around a jokes’ website, I discovered something that had a scope of being converted to a beautiful Infographic. The title of the joke read, “Engineers are impossible, they can do anything!”. It was type of a “Math Joke” and below is the infographic I drafted for that post. (Since this is the first time I am making an infographic, please forgive any mistakes or errors in it and do point them out in the comments!)

If you believed in the Maths shown on the infographic then you should “Go Home and apologize to your parents” because the Steps used in that are logically not possible! **This is just a joke, so don’t take this seriosly**

Read more »

Installing Husband

Read the hilarious conversation between a woman and an IT guy.

A woman writes to an IT Technical support Guy

Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and I noticed a distinct slowdown in the overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under
Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as News 5.0, Money 3.0 and Cricket 4.1.

Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?

Signed,
Mary
========================================================================================

Reply by the IT Support Guy

Dear Madam,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system.

Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the latest Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband1.0 should then automatically run the applications, Jewellery 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Silence 2.5 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will download the Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Good Looks 7.7.

Good Luck Madam!

Regards,

Tech Support

========================================================================================

What do you think about that funny conversation?

Read more »

15 Funny Question/Answers on Yahoo Answers

 

If you don’t know about it, Yahoo Answers is a Q/A service offered for free by Yahoo!. It’s a place where you can ask questions on any topic & you get an instant reply due to the large community present over there. At times, people get creative/dumb/stupid with their questions & answers that it just becomes impossible to not laugh over them.

Below are 15 such funny Q/A’s handpicked from Yahoo Answers that will make you laugh your socks off.

15. Can you be more “pacific”?

14. How do I make my farts have shape and color?

13. The scary part is, I think the person who asked this question was serious.

12. My girlfriend farted while kis*sing..

11. I hate my sister. We always fight, what should I do?

10. How many times can you take a shower when you’re pregnant?

9. What’s the worst thing that could happen if I lick a tree?

8. What did birds poop on before cars were invented?

7. What would happen If I sleep with a book under my pillow?

6. How to beat an egg manually as I don’t have a mixer?

5. When to ask someone their name?

4. Does anybody know how to minimize farting and the smell that comes when you fart?

3. Am I turning into Taylor Swift?

2. I just swallowed a sock

1. Help ME!!

BONUS:- Who is the President?

Read more »

Sick Jokes of the Week

Tea is for mugs.

Labour MP Eric Joyce has been found guilty of headbutting a Tory MP and assaulting another three Tories in a Commons bar brawl.

He got a three grand fine, banned from pubs for three months and my fucking vote.

Sometimes my girlfriend is so annoying.

"Do you think I'm pretty? Do you think I'm pretty?"

Why doesn't she just answer me?

My wife shouted at me, "If you were half the man you were when I married you, you would have done something when that bastard in the pub insulted me."

"Love..," I replied "If you were half the woman you were when I married you he probably wouldn't have insulted you in the first place."

I looked out the window and it was pissing it down.

I thought, 'Fuck it, I'm not going out in that. I'll pick the kids up from school tomorrow.'

Tesco has announced 20,000 new jobs are to be created in the UK.

Poland's Prime Minister has welcomed the news.

Torres is the proud holder of a new footballing record.

He is now averaging 1.6 goals a manager at Chelsea.

Today is International Women's Day.
It was actually supposed to be held yesterday but they took too long to get ready.

A pound coin was thrown onto the pitch at Ibrox. Police are trying to determine whether it was a missile or a takeover bid.

My wife just called me.

She said, "Three of the girls in the office have just received some flowers for Valentines Day, they are absolutely gorgeous."

I said, "That's probably why they've received flowers then."

Read more »